I might as well update since I'm here. I've turned into Mr. Miaggi. Yep, I think that's it. oh wait...do you wanna hear a gay story? Once upon a time...Delaney...the end. hahahahaha (i think colleen might be the only one who gets that. oh, sorry i missed chris's b-day thing. i had prior engagements that i just couldn't get out of. Just for clarification, that gay joke doesnt mean that i dislike Delaney in anyway. I actually adore him and admire him a lot, although he's disappointed me a little, but i let him know and now I think he's ashamed of himself cuz i saw him all weekend. Only glances were passed, but no words. It's ok though, it has to be cuz of the circumstances, but i'm sure that things will look up for us in the communication department when I become 18. Anywho, Life's good, but i'm hella tired. peace the fuck out

i got this fatty bruise on my arm. It hella hurts. i got my blood drawm (again) yesterday to check my white blood cell count. I finally got things squared away with Michael and it turns out that he missed me so much and all those calls on my cell where nobody said anything was him. we cried we hugged, affections were exchanged and we spent the night together reading cosmopolitain and attempting to watch that movie where those two guys go on a gay cruise, but the dvd player kept buggin' out. I think he understands that i literally love him more than life itself, especially since now i'm dying at a more rapid pase than others. I've been hella taken all these freakin' pills. i might be ok though. i have this reassuring feeling that the hella strong as pills and shit that they gave me last time got rid of whatever it was that was causing my kidneys and liver to shut down. I'll know if i'm still at a faster death rate as soon as my new doctor calls back with the results. here's a question, what do you do when your best friendship emotionally goes beyond just friends?~CIRCUMSTANCES:one has a "significant other", the other is terminally ill, both noticibly share sparks when together. what to do what to do what to do...Nobody has to answer that cuz i have another reassuring, calming feeling that everything will word out and be ok. ~peace the fuck out

WOW! If 10 years ago people had told me that girls would be going completely gahgah over Trent, I never would have guessed. He probably doesn't remember me, but that's ok. I prefer to not have people remember that fat me cuz then they fixate on it. But anyways, was a pretty cool little kid (kind of a dork, but i always thought he was funny) and when i saw him a couple of years ago, he got even cooler, so I can only imagine, at that rate, how cool he must be now. It's so weird to me to grow up with people, but then as you get older, you don't see a lot of each other, then they're usually gone for waht seems like forever then *BAM! BAZOOKA JOE!* they're back in your life in some way. Don't get me wrong, i'm not saying that Trent and i were boosum buddies. I am actually pretty sure that i got on his nerves (nobody liked the fat kid) but i annoyed him on perpose cuz he called me fat once and it hurt my feelings. He usually hung out with Aaron "sonofabitch" and all thems anyways. not like any of you know who Aaron is except for maybe colleen. I wonder what it would be like to talk to Trent again. I know he won't remember me now that he has his newfound hottness and apparently everybody thinks that he's the coolest thing since pet rocks. ok i'm babbling. ima go now. peace the fuck out.

Has anybody noticed that "no one" is two words and yet the infamous "they" people try to teach it to us as if it were one????yeah...right! CLEARY there is a space!!CHYAH! I've decided********INTERRUPTION***********MY SISTER'S CAT WAS CHASING A FLOATING POO**************THIS HAS BEEN A MESSAGE FROM YOUR LOCAL LYSSA BROADCASTING. TOMORROW'S STORY, WHOSE SHIT WAS IT???****************************anyways, as i was saying before my sister's cat got shitfaced, i've been thinking about Chelsea and i really don't like her all that much. I told her that i was tired of being used as her little "marriage counselor" and that Michael would be better off alone and she got pissed but of course played it off like she wasn't and she hasn't called since :). OH, i died last night but michael saved me. WOAH DUDE!!! It was awesome. my heart stopped and everything. So, i was making shadow puppets last night and I don't know what happened but i think one of them was rabid and ate my sister's cat. We did emergency surgery and everything turned out alright, but thanks for caring. It was a tramatic experience for everyone. Did you know that Tim wears a seal suit and he LOVES platipie HAHAHAHAHAHA silly hippopotamus!!!*NARF* my mom says i have to go to school tomorrow and I think i'm going to get suspended, that is if my not so appreciated sense of humor is well...not appreciated. All i'm going to say is,"So what you're really trying to say is...(repeat everything that has just been said to you)?" WHAT!!??!! WHO'S FUNNY??? I've gotten completely off topic and is that how you spell completely? it must be cuz i spelled it like that twice. Did you know that my mom owns the sea of eyes and the forest of ears??? YEp, they're in a jar. they were actually kind of expensive but there's fish in there too so i guess that's why it costed so much. Ok, here's your assignment, i want all y'all to write a five page essay (double spaced in 12 font) defining the word "pineapple" without using the dictionary. It will be worth 99.9% of your grade. GO! I don't know what drug they put me on but it starts with a K. K-Martia!!!!I wanna name my kid Chlamidya. WHat?! clearly i was bluffin'. I think i'm going to have to tell my mom that i am disenclined to acquest to her request...that means no. you see, the pirate's code is more like guidelines and they only pertain to pirates...PARLEY!!!!!!!!HMMM HMMHMMM AND REALLY BAD EGGS!wait, no, i think my dog just farted. false alarm there are no really bad eggs here, it was just dog ass.EVERYTHIG IS O-K! EVERYBODY'S SOLO!!!!!!!White Stallion!!!okay, i think i need to go to bed. Minus that. i have to stay up. don't ask questions, we're better off this way.

I have a feeling that I'm not going to be around much, but heed my warning and please take my advice. life is too short to dwell on the bad things, yet it's all too long to hold a grudge. remember that the heart wants what the heart wants and don't ever be ashamed to love. charish the family that you're born into and let their weaknesses be your strength. Don't succum to depression as if it were a welcomed guest at your door. everyday you should wake up thinking how to make your world a little brighter, not how to re-deal with dealt problems of the past. when you lay your head to rest at night, recap on all the things that went right that day no matter how small they may be, but don't wish death upon yourself for a days worth, or weeks worth of agony, fore you'll regret it with an eternity worth of pain. Love yourselves and respect your bodies. always use the corresponding action with the emotion that you feel. If you don't, how is anybody supposed to know what you're really feeling. It doesn't matter if others charish you, charish yourself. guaranteed that when you learn to love and respect yourself, others will follow. NEVER, EVER, EVER BE ASHAMED TO LOVE...you never know when it might be too late.

I don't get why people have to fight. It bothers me. currently i'm listening to my mother and my sister go at it. It's like a daily thing and I always am the one that they are fighting about. I always get punished for her stupid immaturity. I get the car taken away, i lost my bedroom, i lost my best friend, and now she's just managed to alienate my other best friend, our dearest colleen. I understand her attacking me and cornering me but how she gonna act cornering poor colleen all she wanted to do was go the hell home. I'm tired of people always confusing me with lyssa. I'm not a bad person, i'm not immature, i never call her bad names or talk down about her to others (until now) and i still get reamed by my mother for being immature and rude to my sister and treating her disrespectfully. I could sit there and just take everything that lyssa says to me and just blow it off and somehow my mom will come to me and tell me that i need to treat my sister nicer and i need to not spout profanities at my sister. She fuckin' flips the whole god damned story around and it pisses my off!I apologize, it's just there is nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. I need to cry but that shows weakness and she feeds off of it. She makes me feel so ugly. she's always calling me a selfish, egotistical bitch. I used to not believe it but when you here something so often and then your mother doesn't even stand up for you cuz she wants to be "fair". WHAT THE HELL!! I'm not aloud to talk to her for a week, but my god, she fuckin' waits for my mom to go into her room and then fuckin' corners me again and so i get loud and get into trouble. I'm just Haley, trying to do my own thing. don't step on my coat tails, they're all i got. can you believe that mofo said she was going to fuckin' deck me?!?!?! how you gonna ack?! sorry. you would never hear bs like that comin' out of my mouth cuz i have respect and maturity stupid bitch. GGGGRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!i apologize once again. peace the fuck out. colleen, i love you and if lyssa causes us to break up cuz i've noticed a remarkable trend with her and my best friends,ima kill a bitch, did you know that she wished death upon my mother right infront of me and my mom, and right to my mom's face too. OMG! the fuckin' nerve. sorry, that bothers me cuz i'm like a black boie with his momma. don't you be messin' with my momma. peace the fuck out

I can't have any contact with my best friend since i was 5, krystyn, for six months. It was part of some agreement so that she didn't have to go to juvenile hall for shop lifting. apparently my sister and i are written down on krystyn's legal documents as accomplices just because we were with her when she was shoplifting. this better not go onto my record because my ass didn't do jack shit!! I think this is hella gay cuz they're going to keep krystyn from the two people that were trying to get her to stop stealing, but they will let her hangout with all the people that got her shoplifting in the first place. GAY!!!!!!!!! oh well, i kinda have to take this one up the ass and just keep truckin' cuz i got classes to pass and homework to do. I think i must have done something horrible in a past life because all this stupid shit keeps happening to me and i didn't do anything. blah blah blah blah peace the fuck out

if anybody reads what i just wrote, feel free to tell me what you think, you don't have to but i'm just in serious need of some lovin'.BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!ok that's better. don't you always feel better after a good yell?

Date:	2004-02-15 02:59
Subject:	I didn't have a pen or paper
Security:	Public
Mood:	crushed

(sorry everyone, but it's late and i didn't have a pen or paper and i didn't want to wake up colleen although i think she's up and it sounds like she is having sex with my sister, but anyways this is a letter to my best friend who kinda hates me right now.i warn you, this mofo is long so if you wanna read about two people that couldn't be so right for each other then read on)
Dear Michael.
I'm going to make this as short as i possibly can because i know that i have a tendency to babble a lot when i get nervous. I've been racking my brains for months now trying to figure out what it was exactly that i did that would make you go from loving me to death as your best friend to hating my guts to the point where you wont even hangout with your girlfriend if you know that i'll be there. At first i thought that it was because of the clothes thing, but that doesn't make any sense. I would understand you being upset with me for a short time because of that only because I was the driver, but i didn't say anything...at least not until i heard you through the phone calling lyssa and me lying bitches. That really hurt but i got over it and forgave you right then and there because i know how you have a tendency to say things that you don't mean when you are angry. So now that that insident was ruled out, I thought that maybe i had hurt you really bad in some way and you just won't say anything because you know that you shouldn't be feeling what you are feeling. If this is the case, I am so sorry. i didn't mean to. I can't really do much other than apologize for that because that is the only thing that i regret doing and that i know for sure that i actually, probably did. I kills me to not know what it is that you are mad at me for. I would have loved to have talked to you about this earlier and in person, but i didn't know what to say to make it better and it doesn't help that everytime i think about it i cry because all i can think about is all the hella fun times that we've had together. We went everywhere together and we even completed each other's sentences if we even had to say anything at all because we already knew what the other one was thinking. but along with all those good times, i wonder if you know how much you're hurting me. Things get back to me about how you think of out friendship as a mistake because having a girl bestfriend means that they are going to screw you over. And then there's the whole thing about you telling everyone that I'm totally in love with you, i basically want to break up you and chelsea and that i want to beat your cakes and that's why i didn't go out with aaron. I think you seriously misunderstood what i was saying. It's true, i didn't go out with aaron because i love you, but the love i have for you is so much more dear than the typical highschool definition of love. If i was in love with you i would say, "Michael Pahlas, I am in love with you." and you better believe that i would let the whole world know it. The current love i have for you doesn't really fit any classification because it's just that pure, untouched and innocent, but if i absolutely have to put it somewhere i'd honestly put it in the soul mate section (I'm going go on the assumption that you don't really understand the true meaning of a soulmate so lets just say that the love goes into the life friend section). Everything that i have ever told you about my feelings has been true and they haven't changed, at least not to my knowledge. So, when I also said that i would rather be with you than with aaron, it meant that i liked aaron a lot but being with him wasn't even close to being as important as your friendship and being able to hangout with just you and me. I don't know if you'll appreciate it but i'm kind of like tim in a way, i have difficulties saying no, but you should be happy that i said no for you. so ontop of all this i also had troubles deciffering what type of love i have for everyone that i encounter. Thanks to a really good friend of mine, chris, he helped me figure out how to determine which love is which. Sorry, i'm babbling, but all that was actually kind of important and please, by all means, if you are unsure or confused about anything, just ask me and i will be honest with you, all you have to do is ask me or else i will never know what the problem is and i'll end up feeling like this again. You know what, it also crossed my mind that you could hate me because of maybe something that lyssa said but you thought that i said it because that happens to me a lot. or maybe you don't like being around me because I"m too smart and i makes you feel stupid. if that's the case then why don't you listen to me when I'm being serious. I have a lot to offer and you know that, or at least you did know that. I don't mean to make you feel stupid and you shouldn't even feel that way in the first place because you really aren't stupid at all. I"m sorry i just don't understand, you used to love all these things about me. you bragged more than i did about how smart i was even though i honestly don't think i'm that smart and you used to actually listen to me whenever i gave you an honest opinion, but now i don't even think you like it that i have my own opinions and this is where i get hurt once again. my opinions are my own and they won't change for anybody but me. if i change my opinions then i change myself and i don't want that becuase i like who i am and i'm comfortable with myself. but you see, the great thing about an opinion is that it's not a fact, it's not right and it's not wrong, so anything goes. here's one of my opinions right now. I miss you and no matter what you say or what you do will ever change the way i feel about you. I believe that our friendship is still there because i know you don't truley hate me, i also know that you are unhappy,which kills me the most because all i can do is sit by and watch my best friend be so unhappy. sure, you're happy on the outside, but on the inside i know you're not, and that's hard for me because i feel the need to help you but you haven't asked for it yet becasue i dont even think you know what is going on with anything anymore.Crap, i am no good at this. please please please ask me questions about this because right now it is late and i'm cryin all over myself to even make any sense. I just wish that you could look into my eyes and see everything that i'm thinking and feel everything that i'm feeling that way i don't have to sound like a bumbling idiot and maybe you would understand. so i hope this cleared up some things but i know there's a lot more i just dont know how to bring them up. well, i'll see you later for sure because i'm always at your house. ~haley

happy venerial disease everybody!!!! sorry i haven't been around much but I've been really sick. there isn't much that I can say. I haven't seen the world in about 3 days cuz i've been sleepin' oh and guess what? IM STILL TIRED!!! who woulda thunkt it???? well, i gotta go get ready, my sister and i have a date with the capital thunder hockey team. That's right...i'm straight pimpin' it. WHAT!! WHO SAID THAT!!??!! I might stop by true love later tonight though if im not too tired cduz i've been cravin' an MJ like no other mother. like woah! Love to everyone and I miss you all. ~peace the fuck out~

i've decided that somebody needs to liven up my live journal cuz i don't like not having a cool little picture by my name. that's lall i have to say about that

Date:	2004-02-08 21:43
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	irate
Music:	fighting

ok, gayest thing happened to me yesterday and by gay i really mean gay. so, i come home and i'm dog tired but i had to go into my room (which is under massive construction right now) because i had to go put my rings in a safe place.Just to give you an idea of where my bedroom is located, it's right smack dab in between my sister's bedroom and my brother's bedroom. so, i go into my room and it's like 11:30 at night and i get bombareded with my brother's tv. Instantly i get a massive headache because it's so loud, then as i'm pondering why my brother always has his tv on so loud until all hours of the night, i got my answer. manly moans. yes, that's right. GAY LOVE!!! this shit hella isn't going to fly with me. That shit is nasty!!!!!!! so now i'm stuck in a predicament because I can either stay in the same room and bed as my sister or I can move into the middle bedroom and listen to a hella loud tv and gay man love every night. Either way somebody' getting screwed up the ass. HAHAHA that's punny. anyway. Ima pass out. BLAH! Not to mention I can't stand the fighting that goes on in this house. i apologize if I have been repetative at all, it's just that my mom and step dad and sister are hella fighting and steve keeps walking behind me and reading my shit.a tout a l'heure. peace the fuck out.

I love colleen with all my heart. when my home girl is down and out i will still have love for her. we straight thuggin' togetha fo' life! no man or mom can break this bond. Shit...we gonna get jobs and straight move out but COCO I'm not going to call Dillenger until we have jobs and are financially stable enough to move out all together, just to be safe but if you ever need a place to stay my door is always open. party over here, j/k.

oK ok ok ok oK. OH MY GOD! MY BROTHER just got home and like i swear to god that every person that comes into his bank fucking shits their pants. There's this old man that stands outside of the bank like every other day and before he goes in, he takes a fat shit in his britches like woah before he comes into the bank. and like whenever he comes in all the people that have been working there hella close there windows and the poor new girl always has to take car of that stinky ass old fart (literally) and i guess she fuckin' threw up cuz his shit was stinkin so bad!!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHa!!!oh oh it gets better. one of the girls that works with my brother was on her way to work and she hella had to got to the bathroom but she was stuck in traffic so she leaned over cuz she thought that she just had gas and she hella shat her pants and the only person she could think of calling was her best friend and she still went to work. HAHAHAHA!!! this is probably one of those location things unless you know all my facial expressions like colleen does but i think this shit is hella fuckin funny!!! im out niggas fo' sho' I ain't no crack hoe. peace the fuck out.

werd of advice for all you coolioes out there, don't wear canvas shoes in the rain!!!It was a horrible experience. I don't want to talk about it. All I'm going to say is that I felt like I peed my pants from the ground up. Anywho, i'm totally diggin' this color. It reminds me of Prince. I'm glad Colleen had an awesome time driving today, then maybe she'll be confident enough to drive my ass around when she gets her license. I feel like the most boring person in the whole fucking world!!!!!!!! I hate the rain it makes me depressed (unless it's rain in Hawaii cuz that shit's hella warm). I like ate the whole fuciking left side of my gotdamned fucking shit ass of a kitchen. I chewed the knobs right off the cupboards. I'm a fat cow! Actually i'm not, i just feel like that girl that turned into a blueberry from that horror movie, Willy Wonka and his fucking freak ass Oompa-loompa chocolate factory. Speaking of blueberries, i want some. B.M.B.A.L. (before my boring ass leaves) colleen, sweety, we need to start running or else i'm going to be a fatty McGatty...again. I don't wanna be a deuce!!!WAAAHHH!!!

colleen, ur such a bad influence on me...i like it :) g-nite, sleep sweet sugah. *muah

hey, all y'all, don't be hatin'. Don't mean mug yo' mama wearin' a bonnet. fo' sho' don't lick yo' tit when the appo' drip!! drip drop, y'all need to stop. Hit that, quit that. nah I'm bluffin'

OMG!!!!!!! Th most awesomest possumest thing happened to me tonight!!!!!!!Colleen and I were coming back from the pasghetti factory downtown and we was talkin' 'bout all our guy troubles and how "we're sooooooooooooooo fat! nobody likes us! :(" and my home dizzle was all like, "fo' shizzle dizzle assholizzle! Hella pimps be'd holla'in' atchoo foo." And I was like, " Like woe dude!? No niggas be holla'in' up in ma hood. I ain't pimp status fo' sho'! whatchoo smokin' bia?" Then colleen dizzle brought up my main man (but he don't be knowin this yit) and she was listen' off this whole gotdamn list of all the boies that come rap tap tapping at my chamber door. So then colleen told me that i should call my home skillet, Dilenger, but I was too scurred cuz i'm not even s'posed to have his digits anyways (i stole them from Dixie's cell cuz her and Dilenger used to go out). I was thinkin how homosexual it was to tell me to call This boy out of nowhere especially since i thought that he wasn't even going to be home. So, colleen made a proposition with me that she would stop smoking the minute that I called dilenger. So we pinky sweared on it and I picked up the phone and before i even knew it, I was callin his cute butt. I thought that he was going to be hella wondering where I got his number and I thought that he was going to be hella short with me, but he talked to me through the last few seconds of the superbowl, and he even giggled.AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! i'm going to explode!!!!!!! TEE HEE HEE!!! I LOVE YOU COLLEEN!!!!!! UR MY DAWG FO' LIFE NIGGA!!!SHIT SON...I'M FEELIN' THIS!!!!!!!WHAT!WHAT! WHO SAID THAT!? WHAT WHO'S HUNGRY!!OH MY OH MY GAD! Well, love, peas, and chicken grease. All y'all peace the fuck out

Date:	2004-02-01 12:12
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	frustrated

Just thought I'd share with all y'all that this college search bs is fuckin hard!!!! 

Date:	2004-01-31 15:41
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	amused

there's a frozen tater tot on my desk. fo' shizzle. my pits stink like woah dude! Colleen's ass smells like ass cakes on a moldy cinnamon role. this shit ain't cool. i'm lyin'. my pits smell fine but i still don't know bout colleen's ass fungi. yeah, Colleen and i had moldy ass fungus love last night on the couch...we turned it green. I'm fucnin (that's right, i said it) gonna have a heartattack cuz i was laughing so hard but now i'm breathing. Has anyone ever shat their pants, not saying that i do, but  i did last night and I haven't taken a shower since.  WHAT! who said that!!!! whose hungry??!!!!J/k.

this message has been brought to you by: Haley is a weirdo.colleen love for lifizzle m'nizzle